How to Avoid Over-Descriptive Writing
In the last post, we tackled “show, don’t tell.” Great advice—until it backfires. Because once you start showing everything, suddenly your story isn’t moving… it’s crawling under the weight of a hundred adjectives.
That’s when you’ve crossed into over-descriptive writing (a.k.a. purple prose): sentences so ornate they should probably come with a chandelier.
Let’s break down what this looks like, why it happens, and how to keep your prose vivid without burying your story under velvet drapes and crystal teardrops.
What Is Over-Descriptive Writing?
Over-descriptive writing (purple prose) is when you pile on so much detail the story slows to a halt.
Purple Prose: “Her azure orbs shimmered with crystalline tears as they cascaded down porcelain cheeks, tracing rivulets of sorrow.”
Balanced: “Tears streaked down her face.”
One paints a picture. The other paints a mural you didn’t ask for.
Why Writers Fall Into Over-Descriptive Writing
Taking “show, don’t tell” too literally. You try to show everything.
Fear of being boring. So you add adjectives, metaphors, flourishes—anything to “sound like a real writer.”
Over-correcting. After being told you “tell too much,” you swing hard in the opposite direction.
Result? Prose that calls more attention to itself than to the story—like a character shouting “look at my velvet cloak!” instead of just walking across the room.
Examples of Over-Descriptive Writing (and Fixes)
1. Overloaded with Adjectives
Over-descriptive: “The small, cozy, warmly lit room was filled with plush, velvety chairs.”
Balanced: “The room glowed warm, with velvet chairs pulled close together.”
2. Metaphor Pile-Up
Over-descriptive: “Her laughter rang like bells, like chimes, like the delicate shatter of glass under moonlight.”
Balanced: “Her laughter rang like bells.”
3. Slowing Down the Action
Over-descriptive: “He extended his long, sinewy arm, veins taut under pale skin, fingers curling one by one toward the silver handle of the ancient oak door.”
Balanced: “He grabbed the door handle.”
How to Fix Over-Descriptive Writing
Ask: Does this detail move the story? If not, cut it.
Choose one strong image. Don’t stack three metaphors when one does the job.
Prioritize emotion or action. Description should support the scene, not stall it.
Trust your reader. You don’t need to spell out every shade of blue—they’ll meet you halfway.
Takeaway
Description is powerful—but too much bogs down your story. Balance is the goal. Show when it matters, tell when you need speed, and always keep your reader moving forward.
Remember: good description disappears into the story. Bad description feels like it’s auditioning for a poetry slam.
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